When Grief Makes You Impatient

I’ve been thinking about how grief changes our tolerance for things we used to let slide. Things like a crowded stores or a friend who keeps saying “you’re so strong” or a person who always complains about something small, like the traffic, or the weather, when your whole world has fallen apart. After a death, your patience isn’t what it used to be. And it’s not because you suddenly become unkind, it’s because your heart is carrying so much. The energy it takes to appear “fine” in a world that doesn’t get it can leave you on edge. I remember in earlier grief catching myself snapping at something small and immediately feel guilty. But I’ve learned that this impatience isn’t bad. It’s my body saying, you’re tired, you need space, you’re still healing. Grief demands a lot of us. If you notice that you’ve lost patience for small talk, for crowds, for being “on,” that’s okay. It’s not a sign you’re doing grief wrong. It’s just a reminder that your reserves are low and you need gentleness and understanding from others and yourself most of all.

A few that can help:

Step back before reacting. When something sets you off, pause and take a slow breath.
Lower the bar. You don’t have to be endlessly patient, cheerful, or composed. Some days just getting through is enough.
Use words when you can. “I don’t have it in me right now” is a perfectly fine boundary.
Notice what drains you. Loud spaces, certain people, too many commitments…pay attention and pull back when you can.
Find quiet company. Being around others who understand grief lets you breathe without performing patience.

~ Robyn

Robyn Houston-Bean

Founder, The Sun Will Rise Foundation

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THE WEEK AHEAD

Partner/Spouse group being facilitated this week by Carol Bowers.

HERE’S SOME OF WHAT HAPPENED THIS WEEK AT TSWR!

We had a wonderful time learning and connecting at the Rize Massachusetts and Mosaic Opioid Recovery Partnership’s Conference, Putting The Pieces Together: A convening to mark the $15M in planned settlement investments with other grantees. We are so thankful for the support The Sun Will Rise has received and for the collaborations we have with other organizations and people!

Tabling at the The Family Restored walk in Medford MA!

The annual fall Call Their Name Hike/Walk was a beautiful time to share together. We had a great walk and the weather and sunshine offered us a perfect fall day to meet other people bereaved due to substance use. Watch us on Tik Tok, as we remembered our people by Calling Their Names! Join us at one of our next events or workshops!

UPCOMING TSWR & SADOD ACTIVITIES & EVENTS

New Event! Join us for a Casual Community Meal before our Young Adult (ages 18-35) Peer Grief Support Group in Medford MA Sunday 10/26/25 5:00-6:00pm! REGISTER HERE! We’ll be gathering outside the meeting space and enjoying some Raising Cane’s! It will be great share a meal, connect and spend time together before the meeting. While this dinner is hosted by our Young Adult Group, everyone is welcome whether you’re part of that group or just want to join for some good food and community. Do you know a young adult who could use some grief support? Bring them to this low pressure event! No need to bring anything but yourself and your appetite. Just let us know you are attending, so we can plan ahead! Come for the chicken, stay for the company & support! Questions? Email Leslie@thesunwillrise.org

SADOD’s OCTOBER PSYCHOEDUCATIONAL WORKSHOP- COMFORTING OTHERS WITH VAL WALKER: WHAT TO SAY & DO. Tuesday October 28, 2025 6:30 pm ET. When comforting others in grief, knowing what to say or do can be tough. This workshop will discuss compassionate ways to support those facing loss. Practical tips and real-life examples await! This workshop will take place virtually on Zoom. Learn more and register at bit.ly/comforting-others-workshop. Please note this workshop has a $10 fee for individuals outside of Massachusetts. Massachusetts residents may attend this workshop for free due to funding from MA-BSAS by using promo code MASS at the time of registration. If cost is an issue, please contact Laura@sadod.org

New event! HEALING THROUGH LAUGHTER, PLAY & GAMES Saturday 11/1/25 10am-5pm. Weymouth MA. Register Required. Our storytelling virtual workshop was such a hit that we brought award winning Meghann Perry back for a full day in-person event! Our bodies, hearts and voices hold and carry so much for ourselves and for others. Spend the day with others in our grieving community. There will be time to play, relax, connect with self and others. We’ll be using theater improv and storytelling exercises but don’t worry - you won’t be on the spot! The Embodied Storytelling method is a gentle, easy, no-pressure series of group exercises. Tap into your inner healer through an essential part of human nature - play - to relax, connect with self and others through joy, and release tension and weight. REGISTER HERE Cost: FREE but requires a $20 per person deposit that you will receive back at the event. If you sign up and do not attend the event without giving us 10 days notice, the deposit is not refundable. We do this to be able to continue to offer events at no cost to you. Thanks for your understanding. Please don’t let the deposit be a barrier—if cost is an issue, just let us know. We’re committed to making this event accessible to everyone. If you have any accessibility needs (physical or otherwise), please reach out. We want to ensure everyone feels welcome and supported. Questions? Email robyn@thesunwillrise.org

New Virtual Workshop! Setting A Place at the Table November 2, 2025, 6:30 pm - 7:30 pm ET. At this time of year, conversations in many of our grief support groups begin to focus on how to include our loved ones in our holiday celebrations. It doesn't feel right to move on without them, and we struggle to find ways to include them. Please join Robyn Houston-Bean and Kerry Bickford as we help you “make a plate” to represent those we are grieving. This plate will be created on a pie plate or dish and set at the table or somewhere nearby to represent the love and memories that will always be present in our hearts throughout the holiday season. You are welcome to join us live as we demonstrate ideas and examples of what this plate might look like. You can either follow along while using your own supplies (list of items with be sent via email after signing up) or imagination or just observe and create your own memorial off-screen at another time. We will leave time at the end for you to tell us about your creation and who you are honoring. Register Here!

JOIN OUR BRAND NEW VIRTUAL BOOK CLUB!

Just read the first book Broken Country by Clare Leslie Hall and we will have a facilitated discussion about it on 11/9/25!

HALO INITIATIVES: FAMILY OVERDOSE SUPPORT FUND

Boston Residents! If you are a BOSTON resident who has experienced the death of a family member to overdose within the last 2 years, you may be eligible for up to $5,000 in financial support. Apply here.